The C-WAC has been contaminating the locker room and dugout of Florida State University for nearly five years. The C-WAC’s wrath is so far-reaching that a single word is unable to express their potency as only an acronym can suffice. The Creechers Without a Cause is an esoteric collection of pitchers that was founded in the spring of 2005 by righty side-armer Brian Chambers and his dubious lefty counterpart Trent Jarvis.  The clandestine group of jesters prides itself in its ability to minimize work while maximizing fun. As senior captain Jimmy Marshall put it, “We just like to groove and chill funky. I mean we’re looking for a good time no matter what we’re doing.” 

Florida State alumnus and C-WAC co-founder Trent Jarvis explains, “It all started following a late night with a few bags of sunflower seeds and a catchy little melody by the Gym Class Heroes.”

Besides Marshall, the current roster of the C-WAC includes senior Bo O’Dell, junior Ben Francis and sophomore John Gast. When asked about what differentiates a C-WAC member from the rest of the team, Gast explains, “We are the guys that the other team hates.”

So how exactly do you spot a C-WAC member? Just look for a cluster of dancing buffoons in the outfield while the rest of the team is taking batting practice or shagging fly balls. Or perhaps check the locker room for a game of pluck while the rest of the pitchers get their work done. When the handsome, talented and totally unimpressed freshman Brian Busch first witnessed C-WAC antics at practice he wondered aloud, “The C-WHO?”

O’Dell, showing strong defense, quickly interpreted Busch’s reaction as one of envy. “All the other pitchers on this team wish they were us. To be honest, there is a lot of jealousy on this staff.”    

As the years have past, there have been many attempts by other groups to sabotage the efforts of the C-WAC, aka the Quacks. Francis explains the animosity towards the C-WAC spawns from, “The love the ladies show us.” Francis pleads for all those who oppose the C-WAC, “To just sit back, relax and look for a group of pitchers playing hack-e-sack with a baseball or having a ridiculously sweet dance off”

My personal favorite and most original reference I’ve heard is, “C.W.A.C: Can’t Win at the Circuit,” referencing the groups’ inability to successfully compete in the world’s greatest video game, Mario Kart: Double Dash. 

Throughout the course of my career, the only person who shared an equally harsh disdain for the C-WAC is my friend and two-time ACC Pitcher of the Year (in my heart) Luke Tucker. “The Quacks roamed the warning track with their grand illusion of importance. In all honesty, they were the biggest joke on the field.”

Jarvis explained that even with the barrage of negativity, the C-WAC will always stand strong, “Many groups and individuals have been unsuccessful in driving a wedge amongst our collection of noble men. The C-WAC is impervious to the attacks of others because it is not a group; it's a way of life.”

The C-WAC is similar to a large group of mosquitoes: no matter how hard you try, you just can’t get rid of them. As painfully annoying as this group of guys can be, there is something entertaining about watching a handful of clown babies prance around. As a cringe begins to replace my smile, I have to say the Creechers Without a Cause are going to be a staple in the clubhouse long after I am gone. So keep on doing what you’re not doing…

Ruairi O'Connor

(photo courtesy of FSU Media Relations Office)